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A beginner’s guide to 'gentle parenting' ft. Dhara Mehta Vora

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Smrithi Mohan
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gentle parenting

Mom blogger, Dhara Mehta Vora aka the creative force behind @adventuresofshanaya talks about the basics of 'gentle parenting' to raise the future gen better.

Parenting is not an easy task as our parents make it look like. The way we treat our kids has to shape the kind of individuals they grow up to be. They become the future adults living and positively contributing to the society is something that needs immense efforts. Half of our population belongs to a generation where parenting was never discussed, it was assumed to be known or something that was passed on from their own parents. We always assume that the way we grew up will work for our kids too, considering how well we turned out. But one thing that the newer generation is realising is that it might not be quite right. They are introduced to the world of 'gentle parenting' changing the way kids should be treated and taught about life. Since the term is quite new to many, there might be a lot of questions surrounding it.

To help us understand this better, mom blogger, Dhara Mehta Vora has laid down a few basics of gentle parenting.

There are so many different styles of parenting, from the Tiger Mom that places emphasis on an authoritarian parent to a permissive parenting style that’s indulgent and has few to no rules. Most of us take a mix of these different styles and tailor-make it to our situation.

Personally, though, I have found “gentle parenting” to work the most for my kid and me. The perfect middle ground between authoritarian and permissive parenting is an evidence-based parenting approach grounded in four central elements: respect, understanding, empathy, and boundaries. It’s viewed as a beneficial way to raise happy, independent and confident kids. Thanks to it trending on TikTok, more and more parents are finding out what gentle parenting is and instilling its techniques in their interactions with their kids.

Interested in putting it into action? Here’s how you can do it!

Set a good example for your kids:

Children often learn how to act by observing how their parents act. For example, if parents handle frustration in a calm and rational manner, their children will probably learn to handle their own frustration the same way as well. Don’t take your child's good behaviour for granted.

Discipline is a must:

Gentle parenting doesn’t avoid discipline or boundaries. It’s okay to be strict with your child when the need arises, and this shouldn’t send you down a guilt trip.

Know your own needs and limitations as a parent:

Face it – you’re not a perfect parent. No one is. You have strengths and weaknesses as a family too. Recognise your abilities and try to have realistic expectations for yourself, your partner, and your child.

Provide your children with a lot of verbal and physical affection:

It’s okay to hug your kids over and over again. This positive affection should be provided on a regular basis whenever children are behaving appropriately. Be a good role model. Young kids learn a lot about how to act by watching their parents.

Make communication a priority:

You can't expect kids to do everything simply because you, as a parent, say so. They want and deserve explanations as much as adults do. Make your expectations clear.

Be flexible and willing to adjust your parenting style:

Kids’ environments have an effect on their behaviour, so you might be able to change that behaviour by changing the environment. If you find yourself constantly saying NO to your two-year-old, look for ways to alter your surroundings.

Show that your love is unconditional:

As a parent, you’re responsible for correcting your kids. But how you express your concern makes all the difference in how a child perceives it. When you have to confront your child, avoid blaming and criticizing them because this can undermine their self-esteem.

Check out Dhara's complete Magazine article here.

Also Read: Mom influencer Aakanksha Dave is all about sharing joy with ‘Me and Mine’

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